


Clear your mind. Then ride with me.

by greedy_dancer



Series: Tropes Meme [1]
Category: Bandom, The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Bodyswap, Comment Fic, Crack, Crossover, Gen, Tropes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-17
Updated: 2012-09-17
Packaged: 2017-11-14 11:49:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/514924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greedy_dancer/pseuds/greedy_dancer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>"If you don't know which of your friends is the Loki of your crew- it means you are probably the Loki," JARVIS informs Tony. </i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Clear your mind. Then ride with me.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jedusaur](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jedusaur/gifts).



> Written for the Tropes meme over [on DW](http://greedy-dancer.dreamwidth.org/641747.html#comments). Unbeta-ed. I probably shouldn't let this be the first fic-type thing I post in Avengers fandom, but I make bad choices. Consider it an experiment.
> 
>  **Jedusaur** : JARVIS/PETE WENTZ BODYSWAP  
>  **Me** : Jesus I should have known you'd come up with the most cracky thing out there. Okay. This is not exactly what you asked for but it's got real chunks of Pete Wentz in it!*

"The pain is temporary, but the truth isn't free."

Tony can't tell if this is a virus or Loki's most inventive and convoluted plan to date, but ascertaining the exact cause of JARVIS'... condition will have to wait until Tony has regained control of his navigation system and made it back to land. He's got a fail-safe in place for hostile takeover situations that should get him back to the Tower if he doesn't check in within the hour, but it won't kick in for a little while yet, and as far as he can tell, he's already over Canada right now. With his luck he's going to end up crashing in Greenland somewhere and probably freeze to death, trapped in his suit with only his AI for company. An AI with a sudden case of emo.

"JARVIS, buddy, I need you to pull it together, okay? Can you get emergency procedure OR-487 in place for me?" Tony tries again.

"Text before you call. I never answer," JARVIS says, sounding much more forlorn than an artificially-generated voice should be able to.

"I'm getting that, yeah." Tony sighs. He can hear the others over the comm channel, still fighting Loki back in the city.

"Guys, I'm going to need you to continue without me for a little while!"

"Tony? What's going on? Where are you? We lost your signal!" Steve says, sounding disapproving.

"Yeah, well, JARVIS has come down with some kind of bug. Don't worry about it, I'll be okay eventually, just take care of Loki-"

The channel cuts off abruptly.

"Hey!" Tony exclaims, indignant. 

"If you don't know which of your friends is the Loki of your crew- it means you are probably the Loki," JARVIS informs Tony.

"No, seriously, what the FUCK?" Tony shouts. "JARVIS, I know you like I made you, because I DID make you, so you're going to pull your motherfucking motherboard out of your ass, stop this bullshit right now and get me back to New York, you hear me?"

"Cowabunga! Eat my shorts," JARVIS says.

Tony closes his eyes and sighs.

"You are the cherry in a canned fruit salad," JARVIS says.

Tony settles in for a long, long ride.

**Author's Note:**

> *All of JARVIS' lines, as well as the title, are actual tweets from Pete.


End file.
